Category — Videshwa

No Special Characters Allowed

Russian authorities have refused to register a child who was named BOCh RVF 26062002.

Moscow authorities refused to issue a birth certificate to a six-year-old boy, whose parents named him BOCh RVF 26062002, an official said  on Wednesday.

“This case has been reviewed by several judicial agencies; but the parents have been denied the right to register the child with that name,” Tatyana Ushakova said. “This was done to protect the boy’s interests. His parents need to think how the boy can live with a name like that and not think about their own ambitions.”

Now, I could argue that BOCh RVF 26062002 is a lot more easier than something like Onisimova Fyodorovich Sviatoslavov, but we’ll debate that later.

It’s beyond me on why people, governments and societies have rules on what or how a name should be. If I wanted a name like manishwa007@yahoo.com, I see no reason why I shouldn’t be allowed such a name. It would be my bloody choice, right? But it doesn’t work that way.

My sister, who is a regular on this blog, doesn’t have a first name, last name or the middle name (something that retarded Maharashtrian babus insist that you must have). She’s just called “Anshu” with no prefixes or suffixes. And it was just a few weeks ago when I tried to register a domain under her name. As she didn’t have a first or last name, I couldn’t figure out what should be filled in the online forms. So I tried “Dr.” as the first name, and “Anshu” as the last name. And the system screamed – no special characters allowed. More on her adventures with her name here.

I still can’t figure out how Tamilians and other people who have initials – like N.Padma fill out internet forms.

BTW, if I called myself manishwa007@yahoo.com, would Yahoo Inc. sue me for trademark infringement?

February 20, 2009   2 Comments

The Transformed Goat

This is almost a month-old news, but still worth blogging. Police in Nigeria are holding a goat accused of attempting to steal a car.

“The group of vigilante men came to report that while they were on patrol they saw some hoodlums attempting to rob a car,” Tunde Mohammed, a spokesman for Kwara state police, told Reuters.

“They pursued them. However, one of them escaped while the other turned into a goat,” he said. While Mr Mohammed said he could not confirm whether a man had, in fact, turned into a goat, he did admit that the animal was in police custody. A photo of the goat, resting on its knees next to a pile of straw, was published in Nigeria’s Vanguard newspaper.

I tell you, it’s a matter of time before the Mumbai police spot this story and do their own replication. Don’t be surprised if a donkey is produced in a Mumbai court in the near future with the police claiming – that’s a transformed Dawood.

February 18, 2009   No Comments

Shri George W. Bush, Bharat Ratna

At first I thought it is some kind of wonderful satire, but sadly it wasn’t. Congress spokesman Abhishek Manu Singhvi thinks George W. Bush should be awarded  India’s highest civilian honour.

Former US president George W Bush should be given Bharat Ratna, India’s highest civilian honour, for his contributions to the India-US  nuclear cooperation programme, a senior Congress leader said here on Friday.

“Give Bharat Ratna to Bush. I don’t know what the rules are but I will officially do something,” Congress spokesperson Abhishek Manu Singhvi said at the annual general meeting of the Federation of Indian Chambers of Commerce and Industry (FICCI).

Now, that India’s highest civilian award has now been degraded to an honour for idiots, may I suggest Abhishek Singhvi be awarded the Bharat Ratna first. Then follow it up by giving Himesh the honour. And then… well, the list is endless.

February 13, 2009   No Comments

Pakistan And Banning Of Indian Channels

Indian TV channels could soon be banned in Pakistan.

A top parliamentary panel in Pakistan today recommended the immediate ban on the beaming of Indian TV channels in the country, a news  report said. Pakistan’s Senate Standing Committee on Information and Broadcasting recommended to the government the imposition of immediate ban on Indian TV channels, The News daily said.

I wish these channels could be banned in India as well. Especially the news channels. But then, if it  happens, Barkha Dutt could turn into a full-time blogger. That would be even more fightening, no?

February 9, 2009   3 Comments

Paper vs. Water

A man in Australia has been fired because he had “un-Australian”  toilet habits.

A man has been fired from his job, because he uses water instead of toilet paper.  Amador Bernabe, 43, is a machine operator in Townsville on a working visa from the Philippines, the Townsville Bulletin reports.

“I went to go to the toilet and I took a bottle of water when my foreman saw me and he said, ‘you can’t bring the water in there’,” News.com.au quoted Bernabe, as saying.

Now, though there isn’t any direct Indian connection to the incident, I still think it is a massive insult to our beloved Indian culture.  The fired-employee has every right to use water. And a very angry me, thinks we Indians must retaliate.

I immediately shot off an email to the IPL Commissioner, Lalit Modi – asking him to sack Matthew Hayden from the IPL, as a  retaliatory action – citing needless paperwork as the reason.

Lalit Modi was kind enough to reply. He clarified that he raised the issue with Hayden personally, and Hayden said :” In India, I always do what the Indians do. With so much of hot curry around, it’s always safe using water. The damned paper could catch fire…”

February 7, 2009   1 Comment

Power and Sex

The Times of India reports, with specific case-studies, on how frequent power-cuts have lead to an increased  frequency of sex in Nepal.

As the long cold winter nights stretch on without TV, internet or other forms of entertainment that kept Nepalis engaged, marital sex is on the rise. So are pregnancies.

Pawan Sharma, a doctor at Patan Hospital, says sexual activity has increased due to power cuts. “When there is power, people are working and have little time for sex. But when there is ample spare time, the frequency of sex increases.”

While the Nepalese have found an amazing way to convert unproductive hours into something really productive, I am sitting in the darkness of interior Maharashtra, draining away backup batteries – all for a thoroughly inconsequential blog.

Sorry, need to log-off for now…

February 7, 2009   1 Comment

The Slumdogs Strike Back…

No, it isn’t a sequel for Slumdog Millionaire. The slumdog critics have finally got their vengeance.

Nicholas Almeida, a social activist and slum dweller -  a critic of the award-winning movie “Slumdog Millionaire” has named stray dogs after those involved in the film to protest against the title.

Almeida said he would continue to press for the movie’s title to be changed, but has meanwhile held a naming ceremony for stray dogs in the slum to publicise his cause.

“I have named them Danny, Christian, Loveleen, Dev and Freida,” he said, referring to the director, producer, co-director Loveleen Tandan, star Dev Patel and leading lady Freida Pinto.

Way to go. Now, I would be even more delighted if these celebrity canines get an invitation to the Oscar night.

January 28, 2009   1 Comment

Loo Talk

A bizarre survey conducted on behalf of Microsoft reveals that almost half of the Australians use their cellphones on the toilet.

One in two Aussies admitted on using the mobile phone while on the toilet, compared to 66 per cent of Chinese people.

[…]

The survey also showed that 24 per cent of the men found it acceptable to propose to their partner using their mobile phone compared to 11 per cent women.

Who else, but Microsoft can think of such crap surveys.

But I do like the Australian way of life. While half of the guys use the phone in the loo, and a quarter use the phone to propose to their partners – I wonder what percentage of Australians propose to their mates on the cellphone, while sitting  in the toilet.

Sadly, the survey doesn’t carry this figure. Neither does it mention what percentage got ‘yes’ as an answer.

January 22, 2009   No Comments

Obama Bhai, Obama Bhai…

A couple of Gujju musicians – Chirag and Jayesh – have gone on to create an Obama anthem in hindi. Check out the video.

Not sure if the video will get them an easy visa into the USA, but can somebody like Bruce Springsteen stand up and return the favour by composing “Modi, O Modi..”

January 21, 2009   2 Comments

Mrs.Mugabe Vs. Mr.Obama

The first lady of Zimbabwe, Mrs. Grace Mugabe apparently punched a photographer of the Sunday Times. And every time the paparazzi gets thrashed around, specially the British ones, I am delighted. Predictably, the newspaper has gone on an all-out attack on the Mugabes.

…the 43-year-old Mrs Mugabe – dubbed the First shopper of Zimbabwe – flew into a rage when she was spotted last week leaving the exclusive Shangri-La hotel. She had been staying there with her entourage at a cost of £2,000 a day while her country endures poverty, hunger and disease.

[…]

Before embarking on her Far East holiday, she withdrew $92,000 from the central bank in Harare. Yet there is no money available for water pumps and electricity supplies to ensure fresh water in the capital. Children die of cholera so that Mrs Mugabe can go shopping.

It is nice to know that the British newspaper is so concerned about the £2,000 a day spending and the cholera-ridden children.  But strangely, why is it so silent about the $150 million of taxpayers’ money being spent on the Obama inauguration?

January 20, 2009   No Comments