Category — Deshwa

Homosexuality Legalisation Procedure

Dr. Kishore Shah tells us on his Yahoo group that he has spotted an intriguing headline on CNN-IBN 

“PM asks Moily and Chidambaram to meet him after homosexuality has been legalized.”

Now, the question is – does the PM want to meet both his ministers together–or separately?

HT: Anshu

July 4, 2009   5 Comments

One-Sided Report

A forensic laboratory in Hyderabad  reported that the CD of Varun Gandhi’s speech made in March was not doctored. And Maneka Gandhi, expectedly, jumps in with her comments.

Maneka Gandhi on Sunday said forensic reports verifying the contents of  a CD containing his purported hate speeches were a “one-sided version”

“The entire tape is doctored, words have been interchanged… the forensic report is a one-sided version,” the MP from Aonla in Uttar Pradesh told reporters here on her way to a party conclave.

Now, what on earth is a one-sided forensic report? Does Maneka expect a report to have “for” and “against” sections like a debate in BJP’s chintan baithaks?

Or maybe she is suggesting that the CD should have been flipped like an audio-cassette by the forensic guys to hear the second side as well? And in that case, probably we would discover more versions of hate speeches by her suputra.

June 21, 2009   No Comments

The Great Indian Press Wallah

Looking at the way the great Indian gutter press has been reacted to MS Dhoni’s approach to the media, I am amused. I have always been amused at the typical Indian journalist’s idea that they are very important people and everyone should treat them with extreme respect. Well I have never thought of Indian scribes any better than clowns and apparently many other people think the same way.

This reminds me of a small incident that happened a few months ago.

It was a petrol pump where a guy just ahead of me in the queue got into an altercation with the filling attendant – regarding if he had reset the pump-meter before filling up the tank.

When the argument wasn’t going anywhere, the car owner decided to throw his weight around. He pointed to a sticker on his car which prominently said “PRESS” and asked “tujhe maloom hai, main kaun hoon?”

The filling attendant, smiled, adjusted his cap and shot back – “Kapde istree karne waale ho?

June 11, 2009   2 Comments

Bachchon ka Dawakhana

Today, I came across a sign that said:

“Bachchon ka Dawakhana”.

Agar, bachchon ka dawa sab khaayenge, to bachche kya khayenge?

 

June 3, 2009   4 Comments

I Solemnly Affirm vs. In The Name of God

The swearing-in ceremony had an interesting sidelight. A handful of ministers decided to take the “I solemnly affirm” route instead of the popular “in the name of God” route.

Of the 19 Ministers who were sworn in, a dozen followed the Prime Minister in taking the oath of office and secrecy in the ‘name of God’ while Sharad Pawar, A.K. Antony, P. Chidambaram, Sushil Kumar Shinde, M. Veerappa Moily, S. Jaipal Reddy and C.P. Joshi opted to “solemnly affirm.”

While, all DMK ministers solemnly affirmed as well, which isn’t a surprise – because it has been an atheist party.

The interesting part was Sharad Pawar. Pawar has probably been an atheist for all his life. But just before he began his campaign for Prime Ministership these elections, he made it a point to visit Shirdi. But given the results for the NCP and his ambitions, no wonder he went back to solemnly affirming. 

But then a few ministers taking this unusual route is happy news for me. It is certainly better than having a completely Ram-bharose sarkaar.

May 30, 2009   No Comments

Bappi Da, 7 Up and the Gold Phiss

Finally, somebody put all the bullion depository with Bappi Lahiri to some good use.

May 10, 2009   4 Comments

Tagore, Slumdog, School

The TOI has two interesting headlines on the same day.

Tagore flunked school, St Xavier’s School reveals

Slumdog kids excel in exams

If the gentleman who dopped out of school ended up with a Nobel prize for literature, and kids with no schooling experience, excel in exams – isn’t there something wrong with our schools?

Or, maybe all is perfectly alright. I failed miserably in college too. Maybe there is a Nobel prize for me sometime in future. A Noble for blogging?

May 8, 2009   4 Comments

Domestic Protectionism

Though I understand very less about Barack Obama’s alliterative comment about Buffalo, Bangalore,  protectionism and outsourcing, somehow I have the feeling that Mr.President is increasingly sounding like my wife.

Not sure exactly what protectionism is all about – but it does sound like putting a barbed fence all around your place and banning all interaction with the outside world.

Now you get a hint of how things work at my place.

Just as Obama would like all his countrymen employed, my wife thinks I should be constantly have a job at hand. And that’s why no outsourcing. So it’s me who has to do all the chores – right from the dishes, washing, drying and the ironing. No outside help like the presswaala  allowed. Cost-cutting, you see. And instead of wasting time watching a cricket match, I have to water the garden in 44 degree heat.  Something the maali could have done.

But worse is the restraint imposed  on interacting with the outside world. All calls coming through – specially if it is a lady caller are thoroughly screened. And you cannot even eye the neighbour’s wife. Protectionism – or whatever it is, at its worst. And all it does is end you up in depression.

For those who think Obama should change his opinion on outsourcing- make him clean the dishes, wash the clothes of the entire family and clean up Bo’s poop for a week. And you’ll soon see him sing praises of Bangalore, Beijing and Bucharest. 

May 6, 2009   1 Comment

The Female Vodafone Zoozoo

Okay, they are called ZooZoos and they are a big hit.

Let’s see if you can work this out. Which of the two zoozoos in the below Vodafone commercial is a lady zoozoo? The one screaming? Or the one hiding behind the car?

Not too tough, right?

More: What kind of a Zoozoo are you?

 

 

May 4, 2009   9 Comments

The L Sign On Cars

For long I thought that the “L” sign you saw on some erratically driven cars (like in the pic) actually stood for “learners”. A person who is learning  to drive – with a learning driving license has to sport that sign on his/her vehicle – so that other drivers are cautioned.

Learner-sign

It was just a couple of days ago when a friend corrected me. The L doesn’t stand for “Learners”. It stands for “Lady”. What it signifies is that a lady is driving the car – and you better keep a safe distance – else she crashes into you.

May 3, 2009   7 Comments